Lunken And Letting Myself Off The Hook

You're lucky, folks. You're lucky I've had some time to get some caffeine, eat some Taco Bell, and ingest some sugar after my run this morning. Otherwise you'd be reading a bunch of woe-is-me crap. Okay, actually, you might still get some woe-is-me crap, but it's less that it would have been earlier. I apologize in advance.

In case you didn't catch on, this morning's run was a big of a bust in my mind.

Let me tell you the positives first, so I don't get off on the wrong foot.

• I finally got around to tackling Lunken Airport Playfield Trail (sorry, there's no good link to the facility)
• I finished a little more than 3.5 miles
• It was a beautiful (but cold) morning
• I got an early start
• I had one good section ... must have been downhill
• I saw deer
• I selected appropriate attire, despite my initial indecision
• I took lots of pictures (see below)

"Welcome! This is going to suck!"

Contributing factors:

• Longer distance than I've ever done (the loop is 5 miles)
• I didn't get home until a little before 2 a.m. (pre-time change) last night
• I had two big, fat, delicious beers last night
• I had three days worth of carbs between 7 and 11 last night

So, what happened?

I pooped out. I guess it is important to work up to distances instead of just diving in, because my body just wasn't having it. The previous night's activities may have had something to do with it, but I'm not sure how much.

Allow me to introduce you to Lunken Playfield Trail. It's a 5-mile loop around Lunken Airport. It's mostly flat, with only two quick hills (one up, one down, of course). I've only ever done it on wheels (bike) and only two or three times in my life. I'd been planning this run all week and elected to do 5 minute runs and 2 minute walks.

The beginning was rough. I actually considered turning around and going backward, back to my car and the warm hoodie inside it. But I pressed on. I'm glad I went the way I did though; I chose to head down Wilmer, getting the crappy part (next to the road) out of the way first. Otherwise I would have been "enjoying" the scenery of a busy road on my walk of shame back to my car.

Here's a closer shot of the map, in case you want to follow along.

The turn up Kellogg wasn't too bad. It was long, though. This is really the first chance you get to look out over the airfield to see just how long you have to go. It's not a cheery sight. On a positive note, the portion closest to Kellogg (where you can actually hear the cars zooming by on the other side of the trees), felt really good! I think this was around mile 1.5 or 2. So, still within my normal running length. I don't know what happened; I still hold that it was probably downhill or something.

Then I turned the corner again and faced the LLLLLONG stretch of concrete that goes down the Little Miami River side of the airfield. Geesh. It's long.

It may have been halfway-ish down this portion, just past the 3.5 mile marker, where my body gave up and my mind was in no condition to argue. I cut one of my running intervals short a little, and when it was time to start running again, I went for about 5 steps and let my legs stop me.

Nope.
Done.
Finito.
Nein!

I did some thinking on my run, of course.

I concluded that I'm neither ready for nor do I want to participate in the Thanksgiving Day Race (10K). I also really don't think it makes sense for me to do the half Pig in the Spring, either.

I concluded that, while I am perfectly capable of finishing those two races, even if it means walking for the rest of the race because I'm not ready for the distance, I will not be happy with myself, nor feel any sense of completion or victory. If I set out to walk the races, that'd be a different story. I'd be happy with myself. Id' feel accomplished. That would be a part of the plan. But no, I don't want to do it unless I'm ready. I don't expect that I'll ever be able to run an entire 10K or an entire half marathon, but I do expect that I'll be able to hold my own with run/walk intervals like I do with 5Ks now. I'd rather give myself another year (hopefully) to gradually get better, gradually increase my distance, and gradually increase my running intervals so I can complete those runs to best of my ability, without giving up halfway through.

I also concluded that I'm hard on myself. I'm expecting improvements, performance, and distances of myself that people in better physical condition can't accomplish. I need to cut myself some slack and enjoy those little victories that I love so much.

I'm letting myself off the hook. I am a 29-year old obese woman who has only been running for a little over 8 months. I can't compare myself to people that are considerably fitter than I am. I can't expect my progress to move as quickly as others, even if we all started at the same Day 1, Week 1 of Couch to 5K. It took me months to get through Week 1 and Week 2 and Week 3. Why on earth should I expect myself to be ready for a 10K in two weeks or a half marathon in 6 months?

Am I making excuses? It doesn't feel like it to me. I'm not going to stop running, that's for sure. I like it. I'm enjoying myself. I love seeing myself progress through C25K (and soon Bridge to 10K). I feel better and I feel better about myself, so why would I stop? It's only when I try to go to fast, aim too high too quickly, or veer off my training programs that I get down on myself. (Today was "off the program," and look how crappy I feel about it now.)

I have a rough winter ahead of me, beginning with the demise of Daylight Saving Time last night. I don't want to spend that time beating myself up about the half Pig and how I'm not ready for it. I want to use little victories to gently nudge me through the dark, cold months. Day by day. Run by run.


Ooookaaayyy ... Sorry if I killed your mood. Had to get that off my chest.

And now for some pictures! Wheeee!

Quittin' Time - On the back stretch, approximately 3.5 miles into the run.

A view of the airfield.

Part of the backstretch, looking toward the river. Sweet sun stripey thingy!

In the distance is the hill coming down off the backstretch and into the golf course area. It's a steep one!

More airfield, from the golf course side.




I believe that is green #7 and tee #8.

Boring airfield picture.

Incoming! I love when the planes come in!

Sweet.

We don't want the riff-raff mixing with the golfers, now do we? By the way, I almost got bopped in the head by a poorly-aimed drive. And I didn't do the golfer a favor by throwing the ball back on the fairway. Take THAT, bad golfer!

The wonderful mile markers that are along most of the trail. Pretty sure they need to put them everywhere though.

The new-ish P&G hangar near the end of the trail.

Thanks for listening, folks. Have a great week!